The Know Insider Weblog

June 1, 2008

Success Through Systematic Dreaming And Taking Action

Some people love to dream and plan. They may also take the occasional half-hearted action. They will probably fail to achieve their dreams.

However, they are much further along the road than those who no longer dream or plan and who have settled for a boring but comfortable existence.

The difference between dreaming and taking action is not as clear cut as we might think. Perhaps some kinds of action are just less obvious than others. Perhaps regular dreaming is a kind of action which is more powerful than we realize.

Others love to take obvious action in pursuit of their dreams. They are itching to start moving and getting on with things.

They may have a better chance of success than those who are just dreamers because they may accidentally take the right actions or, at least, they will have the opportunity to learn from their mistakes!

However, they often fail for lack of forethought and planning and exhaust themselves in a flurry of activity as they busy themselves with second priority projects and even totally unnecessary tasks.

It makes sense, then, to dream and list our priorities and to take action as well.

Action does not always mean physical action. It could even refer to dreaming as we have seen. If you are learning something new, you are taking action.

Learning a skill is taking action even though there may be no obvious signs of physical action.

One bonus of learning a skill is that you are usually keen to take further action to put your new skill into practice to test your powers.

Some people take the view that learning or taking in information does not require effort or action. It does.

Even dreaming requires effort especially when it seems the dreams are not coming true.

Sitting through long hours in a seminar takes considerable effort. I have great respect for those who are often contemptuously called ’seminar junkies’.

At least they are taking the action of attending a seminar which may well be many miles away. Such attendance is often necessary to learn new skills and to build new confidence.

Most of the abundance teachers tell us to imagine vividly that we have achieved our goals as soon as we wake up and just before we fall asleep. We need to day dream regularly.

This takes an effort. It means we must exercise our will power to focus on our dreams daily. This, too, is a kind of action.

If you want to learn the skill of a copywriter, you need to dream daily about the benefits of being a skilled or even semi-skilled copywriter.

You then need to take the more obvious action necessary to study the work of the great copywriters and to write out their copy so that you can begin to think as they think.

You then need to actually write copy for your own products or the products of others. You need to apply your skill.

The moment you started studying the work of copy writers you became a man or woman of action. However, you could argue that when you started dreaming every day about being a copy writer you were also taking some kind of action.

Analyzing exactly what is and what isn’t action as opposed to planning and dreaming may well be another way of avoiding action! I hope I am not doing that in this article!

Perhaps I had better shut up and we can both get on with some useful dreaming or some useful action. I hope I haven’t confused you too much to do either!

So long as we both dream regularly and systematically and take clear, obvious action to achieve our dreams, we won’t go far wrong.

John Watson - EzineArticles Expert Author

About the author

John Watson is an award winning teacher and fifth degree black belt martial arts instructor. He has recently written several books about achieving your goals and dreams.

They can be found on his website http://www.motivationtoday.com along with a motivational message and books by other authors

Ezine editors / Site owners

Feel free to reprint this article in its entirety in your ezine or on your site but please include the resource box above.

Filed under: Hall Of Self Improvement — Admin @ 11:35 am

May 25, 2008

I’ll Do It In A Minute… Or Maybe I Won’t

‘Procrastination is like a credit card: it’s a lot of fun until you get the bill.’
Christopher Parker

Do you suffer from distractibility? I do. I have been meaning to write this for ages. My problem? Did I have a crisis so that I couldn’t do it? No. Did I find the topic uninteresting? On the contrary, I found it fascinating. It was because I had contracted that dreadful disease that afflicts many of us - procrastination!

Why do we procrastinate? For many and different reasons. Disorganization, forgetfulness, fear - of failure and of success, worry about others’ opinions, boredom with the task to be done, or by being a perfectionist, so not willing to start because we expect not to be able to achieve our own high standards. We think about the task for so long that we never start! We become busy with other things. We allow ourselves to be distracted. ‘I’ll just watch TV for 5 minutes..’ Something else comes up. ‘I don’t know where to start!’

For a day, pretend that you are a well organized non-procrastinator. Become someone who gets started and then perseveres. Has the task been imposed on or assigned to you? Take personal responsibility and make it your own. Are your standards realistic or are you using them as an excuse not to get started? Identify what diversions you use, when and where you use them and then plan to overcome them. What are you gaining from procrastinating?

Avoiding something will not make it go away. Don’t waste time talking - start doing! What are you afraid of? Get a sense of the entire project and what is required to complete it. Break down tasks into manageable steps, estimate the amount of time you think it will take, increase by 50%, and set appropriate deadlines. Put them in a diary. Check them off as you do them. Reassess time commitments regularly.

Choose a regular time each day to work towards your goal. Get the files out! Or whatever it is that you need to start working. Start with the most unpleasant task. Stay with it, if only for 5 minutes. You may find that once you’ve actually started, you’ll want to carry on. Reduce distractions by making your work place conducive to actually working! Get organized. You’re not sure how to proceed or what exactly you’re expected to do? Ask someone. Are your skills and abilities adequate for the task? Do you need more training? If you have started, then get bogged down in the middle, try changing location or position. Reward yourself for a task achieved. Remember, it is better to do something rather than nothing. Find a way that works for you and keep at it.

Procrastinators can become bad tempered and stressed. They often miss opportunities. Working to overcome our distractibility brings with it peace of mind, a feeling of strength and purpose, and a healthy feeling of being in charge of your life, of being strong, competent and capable. And look, I managed to get this written! What a feeling of achievement. If I can do it, so can you!

EzineArticles Expert Author Kate Harper

Kate Harper is based in the beautiful Highlands of Scotland.

She works with people who are fed up with moaning about their lives and have decided to do something about it. If that is you, please see her here at http://www.harpercoaching.com.

She is happy to work with people from any part of the world.

“The distance is nothing; it is only the first step that is difficult.” Madame Marie du Deffand

Take your first step today and contact Kate.

Filed under: Hall Of Self Improvement — Admin @ 1:20 pm

April 11, 2008

How Do You Build Self Confidence?

Building self confidence or improving self esteem is all about valuing ourselves as the persons we are not what we do. Our perception of what we are worth in our own eyes is based upon how we interpret our previous performance. In any situation we are facing, our confidence will be determined by how well we feel we’ve done in previous similar situations. I’ll say, how well we “feel” we’ve done, which implicates that we are using a certain standard to measure or compare against. This standard or values are different from person to person but very many of us require perfect performance of ourselves. If we don’t succeed according to our perfect standards, we end up devaluating ourselves.

What are these standards or values? Where do they come from? How and why have we adopted them and why do we so often question them? We are not born with values, which leads us to the conclusion that they must have been learned in one way or another. So let’s start with examining certain values of our
culture:

  • we value flawless or perfect performance
  • we love to win

These are great values on how we should do - every one of us should do as good as possible with whatever we are doing, there’s nothing wrong with that. But the mistake most of us are making is, we replace the worth of what we are doing with the person or individual we are - no matter how few or many mistakes we make in what we do. Why can’t we value ourselves in spite of making mistakes?

Self confidence is natural; Just remember when you were a kid -you were valued and appreciated and loved for being in this world and you had self esteem or confidence without even questioning it. It was natural. We didn’t have to do or perform anything to get the good feeling of being valued and loved by others. Somewhere in the timeline, through our adolescence or juvenile years, we got this delusion that we had to continually justify our place in the world by proving to other people that we are worthy of their confidence. And for some reason this proof became identical with “The Proof” that we were really valuable. This has really made us vulnerable - because our self esteem or confidence is anchored not within ourselves but somewhere outside ourselves, that we cannot control. The judgement of others determines how good we feel about ourselves. Isn’t that crazy?

So, what shall we do to build higher confidence in ourselves? Here are some tips:

  • Make a list of the things that you like about yourself. Look at this list when your self image is halting. It is important to remind yourself about the qualities you know you have.
  • Make a list of the things that you do well and to do one of these things on the list everyday. A simple but very effective self esteem builder for many.
  • Remind yourself again and again how crazy it is to put yourself in such a vulnerable position such as, letting other people - the man in the street, your boss, your next door neighbour or whoever it is - determine what you are worth.
  • Be kind to yourself and do something nice for yourself, something you like and find enjoyable. Treat yourself. Spoil yourself. Be your best friend!
  • Go to a trusted family member, a friend or your spouse and tell about your feelings of discouragement. Maybe the other can remind you about some valuable things about yourself that you for the moment have kept out of sight of.
  • Take a risk. Not taking a risk is the biggest risk you can ever take. Do something you’ve never done before. By accepting such a challenge, even if you don’t succeed, taking a step into a ‘new world’ is likely to increase your self confidence.
  • If the period of time you’re experiencing low self esteem lasts longer each time, no matter what you do, you should consider seeking professional help. Mental health professionals can be very helpful in building your self image. You can search on the internet, in the Phone book, classified newspaper ads etc.

Be aware that temporary fluctuations in your feelings of self confidence are quite normal. Life goes up and down for all of us. Don’t lose your courage but instead remind yourself that you are unique; there is no person like you in the entire universe, even if you are a twin, therefore you are incomparable. This is true and this is a great truth! Isn’t it?

Terje Ellingsen - EzineArticles Expert Author

Terje Brooks Ellingsen is a writer and internet publisher. He runs the website 1st-Self_Improvement.net. Terje is a Sociologist who enjoys contributing to the personal growth and happiness of others. He tries to accomplish this by writing about self improvement issues from his own experience and knowledge. For example, building self confidence and achieving perfect performance in careers.

Filed under: Hall Of Self Improvement — Admin @ 3:36 am

April 8, 2008

Think, Pause & Talk

There are two kinds of peoples we generally face in every walk of life

1] who talks negative and excessive and

2] who talks whenever required or talks right and right time.

But in reality we get attracted towards person who talks negative and excessive, it gives us fun and tax-free entertainment and we get fascinated and influenced by such activities….. is it good or bad….. the must know and must read facts are as follows… only then you can understand good n bad.

1] They have no relation with the facts, action and event of related topic cause they want to hide reality truth and behavior.

2] They never appreciate any one but to demoralize others in their own way

3] These persons hate others - their requests, commands, advice and suggestions.

4] Making others insult and inferior is one of the special trait they have.

5] They want to show smartness and impressiveness via negative and excessive talking.

6] These persons always want to hold, borrow and fetch credit even if they haven’t done anything.

7] They shows whatever they says and feel is only truth hence they always has false satisfaction

8] Actually they are Hyperbole,Hypercritical,hypocrite persons and are master in hypocrisy

9] Generally they are suffered by inferiority complex in which, because of reaction and compensatory attitude to their feeling of inferiority and also feels insecure hence the develop the sense of extreme superiority to hide inferiority and try to overcome others by talking excessively and negatively.

10] Those kind of people always like to make fun of people.

11] These peoples has no genuine feeling that’s why they all of the above things.

Now the dangerous result of such traits are as follows.

1] Persons having habit of talking negative and excessive will always have permanent mark on person’s personality and it will not deteriorated and it may be inherited to the next generation.

2] These peoples make negative mark on individual & society hence they won’t be respected.

3] It is a biggest punishment for them that they can’t be believed even if they are talking truth.

4] Such talkers will not game any value in society when the reality is exposed

5] Relations are always in the problems.

So kindly avoided and don’t entertain such peoples and if you have developed such habit recently or earlier those days then consider that you have only one and last chance to save and change yourself else you will be facing problems tomorrow. At the end I want to give a tip that is:- If you don’t know how, why & what to speak it is always better to keep quite and keep doing work because it results in progress, it is demonstrative, it builds your confidence–experience–skill and makes you perfect. It also make other to trust in & confident on you & gives respect to you

About The Author

Name : NIlesh B Gore

Profession : Graphologist(Hndwriting Analyst) & SW. Eng.

Email : ng411002@rediffmail.com

Web : http://www.brendynamics.com/hw.htm

Country : India, Ms

Copyrights : © Nilesh B Gore.

Filed under: Hall Of Self Improvement — Admin @ 6:53 am

April 6, 2008

Adversity: Your Seed of Greatness (Three Secrets to Using Adversity to Become Great)

>From our first day on earth until our last, we face different
levels of adversity. Adversity may be sickness, a property loss,
or the loss of a family member. It may be a lost career
promotion or a business setback. How we handle these adversities
defines how we achieve greatness in our lives.

Let me share the story of James Blake, who overcame multiple
adversities, more than most of us would ever experience in a
lifetime and yet achieved greatness. James Blake is a world
class professional tennis player enjoying fame and making a
six-figure income. However, in his childhood, he developed a
rare disease that required him to wear a body brace for years.
Other kids teased him, calling him “Iron Man” from the Marvel
Comic Books, and he felt left out. During this time, he
concentrated on his academics, read a wide variety of books, and
developed himself as a well-rounded person. He also developed a
heightened awareness for others who are going through difficult
times.

Once he had the brace removed, he learned to play tennis with an
intense passion not exhibited by many other tennis players,
because he appreciated the opportunity to finally play tennis.
He didn’t take this opportunity for granted. He attended Harvard
and became the #1 player on their tennis team.

As a promising professional player, adversity struck again. In
1994, while practicing for a major tournament, he slipped and
fell forward striking his neck against the metal pole that holds
the tennis net. James’s doctor said that had James not slightly
turned his head, James would have broken his vertebra and become
paralyzed from the neck down. Instead, he was hospitalized with
a fractured vertebra, blurred vision, and dizziness.

While in the hospital, James did much soul searching. Many
family members and friends came by to offer encouragement,
advice, and support. His coach was a constant bedside companion
and finally asked James, “Do you want to play tennis again?”
James said “yes,” and they developed a plan to start his
comeback.

With the support of family, friends, and his coach, James
started his comeback step by painful step. At first when he
tried to play tennis, he still had to overcome his blurred
vision and dizziness. He had doubts whether he would ever handle
the 125 mph plus serves of his opponents.

Then he suffered another setback. During his rehabilitation, his
father, with whom he had a very close relationship, developed
cancer and passed away. During his father’s sickness, James was
by his side. After his father passed away, James was devastated.
However, he regrouped and carried on with the support of his
mother, family, friends, and coach.

He returned to playing professional tennis, and there were many
more losses than wins. But he stayed focused and determined and
progressively improved. He began playing the top professional
players competitively, and he began winning against the top
players. Then he once again started winning tournaments. After
this long journey, James became one of the top players in the
world.

What can we learn from James Blake’s journey through adversity
to greatness? The following are three keys to making adversity
work for you:

1. If it Doesn’t Kill You, It Makes you Stronger Many times we
face adversities and say, “If only I can make it through this.”
It may be a sickness, loss of a loved one, job loss, etc. By
remaining focused, determined, and concentrating on the
positive, many times you can become stronger.

Parents are now sheltering their children against any little
adversity for fear it might be painful. I say allow your
children to “grow up” and stop sheltering them from adversity.
Teach them how to make adversity work for them. These
adversities and the way they handle the adversities will define
who they are and prepare them for challenges in the future. Some
of our greatest business leaders, scientists, engineers,
inventors, humanitarians, and sport heroes became the people
they are because they overcame adversity.

2. Adversity Often Develops Unknown Talents Once the door of
adversity closes one opportunity to you, the door of greatness
often opens another. James Blake, first during his sicknesses
and then after, developed his awareness of helping other
unfortunate people. Now he runs free tennis programs for
disadvantaged children. Before his sickness, James was not known
for his concentration and focus on the tennis court. After his
sickness, he developed and became known for his mental
toughness. When experiencing adversity, ask yourself, “What
positive thing can come out of this?”

3. Adversity Rallies Your Resources While James was sick, many
resources arrived to help him. First, he had the time to step
back to reflect on his life, goals, mission, and values. Second,
he was able to obtain sound advice from family, friends, and
others that he might not have been able to receive while
traveling on the road. His setbacks allowed him to take time to
summon resources (advice, help, etc.) he would not have realized
if he had been traveling non-stop. He made his “downtime” work
for him.

When adversity comes, don’t avoid it; attack adversity with all
your resources. The way you manage adversity will define who you
are and ready you for future opportunities, because adversity
can be your seed of greatness.

Filed under: Hall Of Self Improvement — Admin @ 1:00 am

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